Saturday, August 09, 2008

what can friends do to help someone who is a caregiver (Pt 4)

Part 4 ... what can friends do to help someone who is a caregiver?

#7 Many caregivers find themselves longing for companionship with others who are going through the same situation.

Some caregivers, well actually two that I know of, were pondering and discussing taking this thought into uncharted territory.

Can two caregivers of two different conditions (Multiple Sclerosis and Autism) supporting each other equal something better?

32 combined years of experiences with family caregiving is more than a resource, it IS a force.

Family caregiving traditionally has no safety net. An in house back-up is revolutionary.

You never retire from caregiving. … “Well, pilgrim, what are ya gonna do?”  Why not kick the box open and pioneer a new trail?

Caregiving is life on the economic brink. Shared expenses could be a step back from that edge.

Splitting chores and errands could be the alchemy to creating more time.

Being able to wind down and wrap up each day’s unique life of caregiving with another caregiver is inconceivable, or is it?

Readers of ‘Caregivingly Yours’ met Jennifer and Tyler in caregiving: fortunately smiles speak”, additional visits have yielded more success than challenges.
Outings with our unique posse diffuse the impact of disability. Is there strength in numbers?  

Visiting our local high school, Jennifer left feeling it is as good if not better for Tyler’s autism related specific needs.

Fate dealt the cards this past winter when their home in Massachusetts changed from years of stability to unknown. We have the extra bedrooms and bathrooms to begin the journey.

Patti’s memory and attention span challenges discussion. When she does focus, her awareness of the demands and toll of caregiving on caregivers is sensitive and concerned. She has enjoyed the visits and companionship. Important to her, this should create more time for outings both collectively and separately.

Like many 20 yr olds Megan’s world revolves around her and lies beyond. Even though I have repeatedly offered her veto over the idea, she has been a solid supporter since earliest discussions.

So in a week, we again open our home and in a sense we all jump off that proverbial cliff together.  

Butch Cassidy: Then you jump first.
Sundance Kid: No!
Butch Cassidy: What's the matter with you?
Sundance Kid: I can't swim.
Butch Cassidy: Are you crazy? The fall will probably kill you.

Caregivingly Yours, J Patrick Leer 


  1. I look forward to hearing all about your new adventures.  
                                                                                           :)  Leigh


  2. It's a brilliant plan, Patrick. People live together for the same reason... to share the expenses of living, the mortgage, the groceries, the power/heating bills... it makes great sense. And there's the friendship/companionship you mentioned. Sounds like you are all good friends already. Instead of your (or her) work load multiplying by two, I'm thinking possibly this will feel more like a division problem, which means that each of you will have half as much ... or at least it will probably feel like that! bea

  3. seems like a wonderful idea Patrick!! wishing you all much success with it :)


  4. I'm excited for both of you and your families! Actually, soon it will blend together and be as if all of you are one family....

    I'm sure there will more than a few interesting stories to come!!


  5. ((((((((((((((((((HUGSTOYOU))))))))))))))))))I know it will all work out for you.It  will be very intresting to read your storys.

  6. ....this really is a unique situation...not everyone can do this and I hope it works for all concerned.  If it doesn't work...have you discussed the escape hatch?


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