cluster headache: brain writhing on a corkscrew

IT lurks in the peace of sleep. No, that is not quite right it IS sleep itself, intertwined and indistinguishable.
90 minutes after closing my eyes, it (a Cluster Headache) jabs that corkscrew from hell above my right eye and torturously twists it in and then out. Malevolently crafted, headaches can last from 15 minutes to 2 hours.
"To sleep, perchance to dream- ay, there's the rub."
I admit I fear and resist sleep even while sleep becomes more tempting with sleep deprivation.

My first episode coincided with my first year of juggling Multiple Sclerosis spouse caregiving and raising our daughter. Cause and effect? Coincidence?

Over the past two decades, Cluster Headache episodes occur on average about every 18 months and last from 8 – 12 weeks.

Sleep deprivation eventually dominates any episode. Piles of things around me tell the tale of lost focus. Caregiving is a juggling act, yet one by one the juggled balls fall. My head snaps at the sound of rumble strips as my tires drift across lanes scaring me into adrenalin fueled alertness.

Disabling? Yes, during an actual Cluster Headache. Inconsistent abilities try to move forward through the deepening mud in between. However it WILL end! Or at least, it always has.

Nothing ends without learning. Empathy for pain in others and a window to better understanding life altered by disabling symptoms are lessons learned from a brain writhing on a corkscrew.

Previous related entries:

cluster headaches aka 'suicide headaches'

by Patrick Leer

BLOGS:

Caregivingly Yours, MS Caregiver @ http://caregivinglyyours.blogspot.com/

My Lung Cancer Odyssey @ http://lung-cancer-survivor.blogspot.com/