Apparently
awakening from her Sunday afternoon nap was accompanied by a significant episode of
vomiting. Aides had cleaned up Patti, stripped bed linen, cleaned bed, and room and
redressed Patti transferring her to her wheelchair.
I had
intended to stop by anyway kind of a reverse extension of “mi casa es su casa”;
could I run an errand for anybody, etc. Plus anytime I can attend to Patti it
prioritizes her care. Her MS cognitive symptoms prevent her from directing her
own care much less remembering what is going or or even what she wants.
So I
took her out for some fresh air in the calm before the storm and some light happy
food for her tummy. Soon she was ready for bed and that brings me back to
making up her bed.
I found
myself reflecting on the handful of hurricanes, even an F4 tornado and blizzards that have huffed and puffed through my decades of
caregiving but frankly paled contrasted to Patti’s rapid progression to severe
Multiple Sclerosis. Nature is transient, MS is relentless.
My
pursuit of a philosophy of a stoic indifference to my own existence is the only
way I have been able to survive as a spouse caregiver. Somehow indifferent I
was invincible.
Successfully
executing the one person unassisted transfer of Patti from her wheelchair to
bed I noticed the intermittent shortness of breath that has been bothering me
and found myself distracted.
Cracks
in the armor are disturbing. Cancer cracked the armor. That ol’ stoic
indifference swaggered with invincibility.
True I had surgery to remove the cancer from my lung but surgery can’t
cut it out of my head, figuratively speaking.
Fortunately
Patti can’t remember so anxiety does not affect her. Whereas for me the question can a cough be just a cough haunts this whole Sandy experience.
Anyway
this is about caregiving not a whining caregiver, sooooo the day after Sandy I picked
up Patti discovering that her care facility had never lost power (even though they have generators) or encountered any
problems. We headed out for an outing into post-apocalyptic South Central
Pennsylvania who knows maybe some 'accessible' looting for early Christmas
shopping. Instead we found only one road closed.
For once
we caught a break. Unlike so many others whose lives have been turned upside
down, Sandy spared our area.
Patrick Leer
BLOGS:
Caregivingly Yours, MS Caregiver @ http://caregivinglyyours.blogspot.com/
My Lung Cancer Odyssey @ http://lung-cancer-survivor.blogspot.com/
multiple sclerosis caregiving care giving care facility
That is good that your part of the state weathered the storm pretty well, Patrick. If only you will be able to weather what lies ahead with caregiving in this new season of your life dealing with the aftermaths of your lung cancer, recovering from it, etc.
ReplyDeleteMay it be a gentle restful day today!
betty
Glad your damage from Sandy was minimal, and good luck with tomorrow's scan. You are in my thoughts and prayers!
ReplyDeletePeace,
Muff
P.S. Can you believe that I just learned today that my mother's facility has no generators in her wing!? They use long extension cords. Fortunately, they came through the storm all right!